Three Men and a Dragon
Episode 7
Based on: Dragon Warrior

“On the fantastic world of Dragon's Den, where dragons and man lived in harmony for a thousand years, the peace has been shattered by the most evil dragon ever to breathe flame: Dragonlord.” The narrator begins this episode.

Dragonlord is chasing after a tiny white and pink dragon, which we‘ll learn is called Puff (and it’s soooo cute). Puff is obviously scared and is calling out for her mother. Her mother swoops down and saves her. Dragonlord orders two other dragons to stop them. One of the dragons sends a tree toppling down on the mother. The mother stands up to Dragonlord saying that he’ll have to kill her before he’ll be able to touch her child. Dragonlord tells her he doesn’t have to kill her if he can darken her heart. He uses the crystal on the necklace he’s wearing and the mother dragon turns from white and pink to gray and dark gray. Puff takes off running and escapes.

A hologram of Mother Brain then appears to Dragonlord. We learn that Mother Brain gave Dragonlord the hypnotic crystal. He’s already used it to darken the hearts of all the dragons on Dragon’s Den except for the baby white dragon. Mother Brain isn’t concerned about it, but Dragonlord tells her that baby white dragons grow up to be powerful adults. He’s not going to let this one slip away.

At the Palace of Power, Kevin and Simon are playing tennis. Simon’s bragging as usual. He says he’s learned his latest serve while swatting vampires on Castlevania. His whip wraps around the handle of the tennis racket. Then he uses his vampire ball. It’s actually a pretty decent match. Simon is using the whip to control the racket and Kevin is using his Power Pad to keep up. Eventually, Simon swings his whip to hard and it ends up wrapping around him. When the vampire ball is hit back to him, it bites him. Just then, Megaman jumps over what looks like at least a 20-foot tall fence and runs up to them. He says there’s an urgent message from Dragon’s Den.

Three old men, known as the Keepers of Power, are talking with the N-Team via the comm. screen. They explain how Dragonlord is turning the dragons evil and if they turn them all evil, Dragon’s Den will fall into darkness for 1,000 years. They need to save the last good dragon. Kevin asks how they’re supposed to find this dragon. In an obvious mistake, Kevin’s jacket is completely red here. It gives it a whole different appearance. The Keepers tell him that he must be clever, but more importantly, he must be a Dragon Warrior. Suddenly, the men are surprised by something. Mother Brain comes on the screen and tells the N-Team that they’re too late. The last dragon is already caught. The N-Team doesn’t believe her and decides to set off.

Simon’s excited because next to vampire hunting, dragon hunting is his favorite sport. He pulls out a foxhunters cap and coat and puts them on. He also pulls out a horn and blows into it. Suddenly, a fox jumps out of the warp behind him and a bunch of dogs chase him. They trample Simon. Simon says that he must have grabbed the wrong horn. He pulls out another one and blows into it. This time a bunch of sheep jump out of the warp followed by a bunch of camel ridding Arabs. They of course trample him. Lana actually seems upset as she grabs his coat and drags him off.

The N-Team enters the town of Brecconry though a warp that comes out of a well. They decide to split up. Simon, Kevin, Kid Icarus, and Duke are going to go try stopping Dragonlord and Lana and Megaman will search for Puff.

Kevin and his team come across a weapon shop. Simon says that he has all the weapons they need, but Kevin insists that they need more. They go into the shop where they’re greeted by a Bobcat Goldwait sound-alike. Kevin trades his watch for some magic herbs. Kid Icarus buys a magic helmet that’s supposed to protect him from dragon fire. Unfortunately, it’s a bit big for him and falls over his face so he can’t see where he’s going. Simon bought something “far more practical”; water skis! Kevin says to Duke that he thinks the N in N-Team must stand for “No brains.” Duke seems to agree.

On Metroid, Mother Brain is watching all of this. She sends King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard to go turn the N-Team into dragon’s food. King Hippo replies with, “whatever you say, Brain Breath.” Mother Brain turns back to look at them and King Hippo accuses Eggy of saying it. Mother Brain shocks him and Hippo gets in a good silent laugh. As soon as they leave, Mother Brain sprays some breath spray against her jar. Arriving at Dragon’s Den, King Hippo and Eggplant Wizard are frightened by two huge dragons. The Dragons explain that they aren’t going to eat them, they are their dragons. Even the dragons recognize that these two are idiots.

Kevin and his group are headed for the Sea of Scales. They were given directions and told to turn east at the shore. Eggplant Wizard and King Hippo then arrive on their dragons and begin attacking them. King Hippo (now with flight goggles and scarf) tells his dragon to fire. The dragon breathes fire at Kid Icarus, who lowers his head. Hey, the helmet actually does protect him from dragon’s fire. Groovy. Kevin zaps at Eggplant Wizard. Eggys’s dragon dodges it and breaths an icy blast that freezes Kevin. Duke gets to Kevin’s herbs and uses them to thaw Kevin out. Good dog.

Hippo’s dragon burns down the bush Simon was hiding behind. Simon panics. He wonders why he didn’t buy any armor. Simon starts pulling things out of his backpack and tossing them to the side. Eventually, he decides that he’s going with the classic whip. He pulls his whip back to strike and steps back, right into the skis. Then his whip wraps round the dragon’s tail. I believe this is the only case of dragon skiing I’ve ever seen. Simon quickly gets into it and yells for the dragon to go faster. The dragon starts whipping his tail round and Simon eventually gets his whip wrapped around a tree. Simon slams head first into it. After brief moment to recover, his eyes literally bug out in a way seldom seen outside of Bugs Bunny cartoons as the dragon, who’s tail is still wrapped up in the whip, is pulled back right towards him. Simon ducks and Hippo’s dragon ends up colliding with Eggplant’s. The dragons eventually fall on them and Kevin and co make their escape. This is the last we’ll see of these two in this episode.

Kevin and his team eventually come across a cave that they decide to hide in until they’re able to figure out what to do next. They hear something coming from behind a rock. Kevin sneaks up on it and pounces. It’s puff. Puff is scared and takes off running. Kevin grabs and holds onto her tail. Duke latches on to Kevin’s jacket. They lose their grip and Puff ends up tumbling off a cliff. Puff holds on for a while before falling and then remembering she can fly.

Kevin tries to explain that they’re trying to help, but Puff doesn’t seem to understand. Simon tells him it’s not what you say, but how you smell. He pulls out his favorite cologne, “Eau de Dragon Perfume for Men” and sprays himself. Then he starts baby talking to Puff. Puff starts kissing him. Then they decide to go find Megaman and Lana.

Lana and Megaman have been searching for hours without seeing a single dragon. Eventually they find a castle and decide that there might be somebody there who can help. It turns out this castle is Castle Charlock, Dragonlord’s home. Dragonlord is warned about two intruders approaching the castle.

They arrive at the doors to the castle and Megaman demonstrates his “lock picking ability.” By that, he picks up the door, and tosses it aside. Inside, Megaman sees that they’ve warped into a dragon’s bedroom. A group of Dragons and Dragonlord himself quickly surround them. Megaman says that he’ll show those dragons how big Megaman really is. He fires a blast at them, but it’s deflected and hits the ground under them. Megaman and Lana fall into the hole and end up in a prison cell.

On the road, Puff starts crying. Kid Icarus guesses she’s hungry. Kevin doesn’t know what dragons eat. Simon says they eat dragonflies of course. He pulls out a can of dragonflies and feeds one to Puff. Puff chews it a little and spits it out. Kevin says where he comes from babies eat milk. Simon tells him that’s a good idea. He can take the baby home with him and come back when it’s all grown up. I wonder how that would go over with his mom and dad? Anyway, Kid Icarus spots a “cow-icus” and they go over to milk it. Kevin says he’s a valley kid; the only way he knows how to get milk is though a straw. Simon tries milking the cow and fails. Duke then gets the jar, puts it under the cow, and “scares the milk out of her” by running around and barking. They use a suction cup to make a baby’s bottle out of the jar and give it to Puff.

Back in the jail cell, Megaman tries blasting the walls but they’re protected by magic. Lana looks over to another cell and sees the three Keepers. They throw Lana a small vial that contains magic warp water. Wherever ever they use it, a dragon warp will appear.

Lana and Megaman spill the vial on the floor and a warp zone opens underneath them. They fall though a huge stone dragon head’s mouth and tumble down a huge slide, fall some more, etc etc. At the bottom Megaman exclaims how fun that was. Lana corrects him. “Fun is when you laugh, not when your heart stops.”

Back with Kevin, Puff stops crying then starts again. Simon goes to burn her and she breathes fire. We get a montage of them taking care of the baby while Stevie Wonder's "Isn't She Lovely?" is preformed by somebody that’s nowhere near as good as Stevie Wonder. Duke rocks the baby in a treetop, but the bow breaks and the cradle falls on top of Simons’ head (Funny, I don’t remember the rhyme going like that.). Kid Icarus plays with a rattle but Puff takes it and eats it. Kevin tries giving her a bath in a small puddle; she squirts water all over him. Simon tries putting a diaper on Puff, but she quickly grabs it and puts it on him instead. Eventually, she wears the entire team out.

Megaman and Lana eventually find the power items, a suit of golden armor and a lightning bolt. Then they decide to climb out of there.

Simon accidentally leads the group towards Castle Charlock because he’s holding the map upside down. Still, they run cross Lana and Megaman, who have the power items. Lana then gives Puff a little hug. Then Dragonlord shows up. Puff runs to her mom, but her mom is still under Dragonlord‘s control and breathes fire at her. Dragonlord starts shooting fire, but Kid Icarus uses a water arrow to put out his breath. Kevin runs over to get the bolt and tells Simon to put on the armor. Simon complains that he looks horrible in gold. He can’t walk in it either. He trips and tumbles. Puff flies underneath him and lifts him up into the sky. Kevin tries throwing the bolt at Dragonlord and misses. He hits Simon with it instead. Simon causally takes it out and tosses it into the sky.

The bolt causes all the dark clouds and mist to disappear. The dragons then revert back to their original form. The dragons turn on Dragonlord and he quickly runs away. Puff then flies back to her mom, leaving Simon to fall though the air and land in a tree. The mother dragon thanks the N-Team. After Simon falls out of the tree, Puff runs over and starts licking him. Simon proclaims that he’s allergic to dragon slobber and the episode ends.

Overall this was a rather nice episode. It always kept the appropriate atmosphere for the time and Puff wasn’t nearly as annoying at she could have been. She actually reminded me of those dinosaurs on the first Land Before Time movie. Mother Brain and her minions really seem out of place in this episode and frankly, it could have done just as well without them. I never really cared much for Dragonlord as a villain and not a lot happened in this episode, but overall decent.

Featuring:
Megaman
Kid Icarus
Kevin Keene/Captain N
Princess Lana
Simon Belmont
Duke
Keepers of Power
Puff
Mother Brain
Eggplant Wizard
King Hippo
Dragonlord